I HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE MANY TIMES IN MY LIFE, BUT IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN VERY FRUSTRATING. WHAT IS THE CAUSE OF IT?

I HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE MANY TIMES IN MY LIFE, BUT IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN VERY FRUSTRATING. WHAT IS THE CAUSE OF IT?

   1:02 AM       shrikant rathod

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BELOVED OSHO,

I HAVE FALLEN IN LOVE MANY TIMES IN MY LIFE, BUT IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN VERY FRUSTRATING. 

WHAT IS THE CAUSE OF IT?

Love is almost an unknown phenomenon, so you must have fallen into something else.... 

And if you fall into something else, sooner or later you have to fall out of it. 

Love is a very rare experience; don’t call it love. 

It is your desire, it is your fantasy that you call love. It is your need, it is your fear of being lonely. You feel lonely and empty and you want to fill yourself with somebody else. And nobody canfill himself with somebody else, so sooner or later, frustration.

Frustration is bound to happen to your so-called love. And then when you fall in love, what do you really start doing? 

You start fantasizing, expecting too much. Because you expect too much, too much frustration follows.

This is something new in this age, and more so in the West than in the East. 

The East has been very pragmatic about love, very realistic. 

Not much frustration happens in the East because people never expect much out of it – so what frustration? 

Marriage comes first in the East. 

And then living together with a woman or man, slowly slowly you start becoming friendly, you start liking each other, you start helping each other, and a kind of love grows. 

But there is no romance in it, hence no frustration.

In the West love has to happen first, and love drives you crazy. 

It is a hormonal disease that you call love; it is something chemical. And in that chemical impact, as if you are under a drug, stoned...

Actually, it is that: the drug has been released by your own hormones so you don’t know it. When you inject a drug, you know. It is a biological drug; nature has been using it to propagate. 

Otherwise, just think – if there were no intoxicant inside you... just think for a moment that there is no intoxication with love, no desire to propagate – who will propagate? for what? 

The world would stop. Nature has befooled you; it has put a built-in program in you, it triggers a process of hormones in you, and suddenly you start seeing dreams and small things start looking very great.

”Let us not make mountains out of mole hills.

”But in love that is what happens – people start making mountains out of molehills. 

And then when frustration sets in, they start making molehills out of mountains.

Everything looks beautiful when you are in that drugged state. 

That’s why in all the languages of the world the phrase is ’falling in’ – you fall from your consciousness, you lose your consciousness, you are almost a drunkard. 

Then an ordinary woman looks so beautiful, so angelic. An ordinary manlooks like Hercules. Everything looks so great and so big, and this is nothing but a projection of your desire.

And sooner or later it will clash with reality – and Hercules will come down, and Cleopatra will comedown. 

And then you are sitting face to face with an ordinary man, an ordinary woman, wondering what you are doing there, wondering how you got there. And if there are a few children also playing around, then finished! 

Then just because of these children now you have to be together. 

Hercules is dead, Cleopatra is dead; just two ordinary, silly-looking people taking care of the children, because they have to be educated. 

And they will do the same, sooner or later.

Your expectations are so great, hence the frustration.

Meditate over this. 

Go very very slowly.

The lady of the house called down to her butler, ”Smithers, come up to my bedroom, please.”When he came through the door, she said, ”Now Smithers, the time has come. 

Take off my shoes.”So Smithers took off her shoes.”Now take off my stockings.” So he took off her stockings. 

”Now Smithers, take off my dress.” So he took off her dress.”

Now Smithers, take off my brassiere.” So off comes her bra. 

”NOW Smithers, take off my knickers, and if I ever catch you wearing my clothes again, you will have to find yourself another job!”

Now this is what happens – you were expecting, expecting, ex... and the frustration!

Osho

#14 

THIS VERY WORLD THE PARADISE

The Secret of Secrets, 

Vol 2